21 Reasons to Marry Smart: Why Divorce Often Happens

If you don’t deal with these issues before marriage, you will while you are married, possibly leading to divorce, which about 40% to 50% of marriages end in divorce in the United States.

21 Reasons To Marry Smart

Did you know that there is at least one divorce in America in every 13 seconds? According to CDC, United States has the third highest rate in the world, behind Maldives and Belarus. An estimated 50 percent of all marriages in the United States end up in divorce or separation.

These figures reveal a rather grim picture of more than two million divorces each year. However, these figures also help underline the need to address issues a couple may be having before marriage. Failure to deal with these problem before committing to marriage doesn’t eliminate them. In fact, you’ll have to eventually tackle them in marriage which increases the possibility of divorce.

So, why are couples in the United States divorcing at such a high rate? Our team has done all the work for you. We analyzed multiple factors that contribute to a couple’s divorce or separation and backed up with necessary data compiled a list of the most common reasons why most divorces happens. No matter what stage of a relationship you are in, you can use this list as a checklist for relationship or marriage problems and effectively address them.

Top 21 Reasons Why Divorce Often Happens

Here are the top 21 reasons why most divorce cases happen and why you should marry smart:

Emotional, Physical & Mental Support

1. Mental illness/ Addiction

Addictions and mental health conditions such as depression and PTSD actively play a role in divorces. According to a study on 18 different mental disorders, mental illnesses increased the likelihood of divorce by between 20 to 80 percent. On the other hand, addiction accounts for about 35 percent of divorces according a recent study. Addiction can range from substance addiction to pornography or video game addiction. Couples where only one of them smokes have a 76-95 percent of getting divorce while where only one of them drinks have a 60 percent likelihood of getting divorced.

2. Feeling inhibited

At times, a partner in marriage may feel that their spouse is inhibiting them from achieving success education, life or career wise. In pursuit of personal excellence, individual may choose to get rid of their inhibitive spouses whom they feel are the stumbling blocks standing in their way to success.

3. Disability/ Health problems

According to the National Center for Biotechnology Information (NCBI) under the US National Library of Medicine, disability and other health problems can increase the chance of divorce by 18.2 percent.  

4. Lack of family support

Family and friends are meant to play a supportive role in your marriage. Unfortunately, this is not always the case and at times the parents interfering which creates a problem in your marriage or simply not there. Alone, the lack of family support in a marriage increases the chances of a divorce by 17.3 percent.


5. Sexual incompatibility

Divorce can also be caused by the divergence in sexual expectations between spouses. Sexual incompatibility results from the conflicting sexual needs between partners. When spouses do not share similar sexual desires due to reasons such as difference in libido, difference in sexual preferences, etc., it may lead to frustration and annoyance. When not properly addressed, sexual incompatibility may eventually lead to a divorce.

6. Lack of commitment

Lack of commitment is the most common reason why most divorces happen. It accounts for about 73 percent chance of why most married couples divorce. Combined with other reasons such as infidelity, lack of commitment in marriage can render it irrevocably broken leading to a divorce. On its own, sharp and noticeable drops can erode the commitment levels in a marriage until such a point where there isn’t enough commitment to sustain the marriage.

7. Infidelity

Infidelity is the second more common reason why most marriages end up in divorce. A marriage in which one spouse is unfaithful is 59 percent more likely to end up in a divorce. Infidelity also triggers other reasons such as lack of commitment, lack of intimacy, etc. Many people find it hard to recover their trust in their spouse after they’ve broken their promise to remain loyal to them forever, leaving a long-lasting psychological scar.

8. Lack of intimacy

Lack of physical intimacy in a marriage slowly creates a wedge between the spouses. Marital intimacy is known to increase the longevity of a relationship by reducing tension, physical bonding and creating an emotional connection. While intimacy can be achieved through sex, kissing or hugging, lack of it causes anger, frustration, distancing and silence which increases the chances of divorce by about 59 percent.


9. Spousal conflict

Spousal conflict in a marriage is the third most common reason why most divorces happen. Arguing too much in a relationship can quickly replace the love and romance with frustration, anger, and hatred for each other. If not addressed quickly through channels such as marriage counsellors to iron out your differences, frequent conflicts increase the chance of a divorce by 56 percent. Conflicts can be caused by incompatibility, not necessarily sexual, due to difference in dreams, aspirations and expectations which creates discontentment. Most conflicts tend to increase in frequency and intensity over time.
10. Abuse

Abuse, either verbal, physical or emotional, accounts for about 34 percent of all divorces. As such, abuse it among the top five reasons why most divorces happen, as most victims see it necessary to end the marriage. Abuse can be traumatizing and severely dents ones confidence and self-esteem. For your own safety, do not allow the severity of the abuse to reach insurmountable levels. Keep an eye out for possible signs of an abusive spouse.

11. Misconduct

Marriage is an institution built majorly on the virtues of loves, honest, loyalty and mutual respect towards each other. Any misconduct that breaches the trust your spouse has bestowed on you gradually erodes the key foundations that hold a marriage together inevitably leading to divorce.

12. Non-stop fighting

A marriage with non-stop fighting is unlikely to stand the test of time. In fact, 58% of divorced people cite non-stop fighting as the reason, or as one of the reasons why they to get divorced. Fights are not only disruptive to the spouses but also have a lasting negative effect on children who have to helplessly watch their parents fight.


13. Married too young

14. Different life goals

15. Lack of interests

16. Boredom

17. Feeling unfilled


18. Financial strain

Financial problems are a major contributor to many divorces. Problems with financial security increase your chances of a divorce by 36.7 percent. While it may not be the major reason why a divorce occurs, financial strain contributes to other reasons such as conflict, domestic abuse, increased stress, substance abuse, etc., as a couple struggles to foot their mounting bills. 60 percent of people who are under the poverty threshold in the United States are divorced women and children.

19. Household problems

There are several household problems that can also lead to a divorce. Losing jobs, not meeting expectations, insecurity, desire for more control, long distance relationship and a breakdown in communication are some of the most common household problems that can lead to a divorce.

20. Religious differences

As shocking as this might sound, religious differences increase the likelihood of divorce by about 14%. Put into context, religious differences alone would be the cause of over 250,000 divorces each year. If not addressed well by spouses, religious difference can lead to differences of opinion between partners which over a long period of time can lead to breakdown in your marriage.

21. Child-rearing differences

Different parenting styles can also mean trouble to your marriage. People are different and while you may be a strict disciplinarian, your spouse may be a little more flexible and less strict. Naturally, children are more likely to choose the parent under whose care they can break a rule every now and again and go unpunished. However, this may put spouses at loggerheads creating a friction point in your marriage which can lead to divorce if not addressed.

Michigan Divorce Attorneys

At times, it may be a little too late to use the compilation above of the top 21 reasons why most divorces happen to try and salvage your marriage. In such scenarios where the marriage is irretrievably damaged and divorce is the only option available for you to explore, you’ll need the services of an attorney knowledgeable in the area of the law.

At The Lobb Law Firm, our divorce attorneys will protect your rights and be by your side in every step of this life journey that can be confusing and emotionally draining. Our outstanding legal team is available to speak with you now. If you have any questions, you can schedule a FREE consultation session by calling us today on 248-591-4090.  You can also visit our various offices conveniently located in the locations below to serve you better:


30555 Southfield Road, Suite 440

Southfield, MI 48076

Traverse City

1001 Bay Street, Suite D

Traverse City, MI 49684

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